withoutapurpose

These were a couple of beautiful picture books that I enjoyed reading. For their stories and artwork. There Was A Party for Langston, celebrating the opening of Schomburg Center in New York Library, the illustrations were filled with movement and energy, important figures of Black Americans, felt joyful, celebratory as well as a reminder of historical figures that one could read more about. Good balance of social awareness that celebrates and inspires. And then this bell hooks book Happy to be Nappy, I loved the artwork and the loving message that it carries. When we watched Malcolm X the film by Spike Lee, I mixed up the Audubon Ballroom (also in New York) with Schomburg Centre, because of the dance hall element and the vivid scene in the beginning of the film. Interestingly on the wiki page I read that bell hooks was critical of the film feeling that it venerated Malcolm X but did not inspire, I value her criticism and glad to have read her to always think and be mindful of power structures, and to think more deeply about political movements. What I mean is that, marginalized people should be careful of just bonding and celebrating on representation only, we should continuously think about not just how we are represented but whether we continue to take actions against injustice, instead of becoming complacent.

Watched Sirat recently and knew nothing about the film before seeing it. The opening scene was atmospheric, evocative of festivals, raves, that feeling of freedom and communal experience. Was a nice surprise to see that Kanding Ray made much of the music in the film, was a key feature in the film and added to its textures.

After a particular scene in the film I was thinking about the necessity of rituals, and made me think of Han’s essay again. Isn’t it an interesting coincidence that it has almost a similar feeling in the cover images to the film screenshot that I saved? Back to the rituals, in the film I had an intense feeling why humans need rituals, too complicated to summarize because of the complexity of human emotions, of intense feelings that we sometimes would need to process and attempt to get to terms with, not even to understand but to at least be able to coexist with; and a process is needed to metabolize these moments of intensity, rituals bridges the need for that. Because rituals helps us to process time, to make sense of time, to coexist with time in a profound way that can be internalized, that could be understood in some muscle memory and reinforced by external perceptions of the ritual proceedings.

It’s been nice to eat so much fish actually and I can feel that it is easier to digest than meat. I have been thinking about the flavor of beef, the iron flavor from a steak…or grilled beef. I’ve also been thinking about emotional eating and its effects on psychology. Food as a medium for comfort, as a symbol of love received, a longing for belonging and community. But if the rest are removed, the community removed, the belonging removed, then food becomes a vessel for an emotional vacuum, and probably that’s when emotional dependency on food develops. It’s not a dissimilar train of thought following finance and psychology, money and feelings.

Before the holidays we finally made it to the repair shop in Zhongli; to proceed with maintenance of my Tudor watch (it stopped running properly for more than 6 months now). I would like to get it back before the summer as blackface watch will be easier to read than white face. Also it will feel something new returns to me again. I’ve been feeling that taking items back from storage, new engagement with older items (clothes, books, jewelry or other objects again.)

This manga series explores Plato’s Legend of Atlantis beyond a myth as a civilization that actually existed. It was connecting dots from global mythologies, legends, interpretations and archeology alongside cults and secret society groups to weave together the story. I found the exposure to all the world heritage, myths and ancient myth connections interesting, but also as time went on the plot felt too convoluted. It’s left an impression on me though so in a few years I would probably take it out to read again. The idea of Atlantis was a bit beyond me at first took a while to understand what the story was trying to do; so yes I think a re-read will give me a different experience.

Jan and Feb were so intense with events, feelings of overwhelm. The evening I was doing Grace’s interpretation event I arrived to our bookstore earlier and saw these (two others too) that Esther made. Two had positive messages and one as an amulet for avoiding bad luck (my interpretation). I wore it to the end-of-year company banquet drew a big prize, also to the book fair when I had events to execute and needing some support. It’s been fun and grounding to have these with me.

Since December there had been so many events, and panel judges that I had to attend, and a small translation project. We handed in Lee Chiao for publication late November but then December had to hold a launch event at the bookstore, instead of advertising on my own social media which has very little activities I sent out invitations privately which seems to work better for me, more focused and targeted. The bookstore event was full, and execution was good. Jan we hosted an event for Grace, which I also had to prepare for but again it turned out well she was able to mobilize a lot of readers to attend. Then the children’s magazine article, MOC judging actually ate up all of my weekends in Jan which was tough I felt I was non-stop working and was able to breathe now and again but it was more relentless than I had anticipated. But I got through them. We went to a nice end of year banquet in Miaoli organized by Lee Chiao’s association and family, a much bigger event and press presence than we realized, with our English edition as gift exchange and a focal point for that evening.

Taipei Book Fair we had another event for Lee Chiao, again it went well too. Chen Yuhong’s event was nicely curated even though I didn’t have to do much, the back and forth though prior about local printing costed time even though it didn’t happen in the end. A beautiful collection of translated poems and the cover really captures the title and the feeling of the collection, a moment in time.

I was happy with the events and meetings that I helped to curate for Sarah, I wasn’t sure how it would go and if we did enough, but in the end the schedule worked out well and there were many useful conversations. I enjoyed that this time at the fair I did more focused tasks for longer times, and delegated other meetings to agency colleagues.

Bought this last year at the book fair, because I wanted to read more of Matsumoto’s works. It was a great story, a mature son with an immature dad, but as they spend time together they develop a relationship. Dad is a baseball fan and in the amateur local team but hits a home run against a promising young player. The illustration is amazing on the character expressions, details on the background, dynamic positions. It’s only a series of three, I read one and will find time to finish it in the future. Glad to have taken a look at it. The holidays I tried to go through some books that I haven’t read, so I can have an idea of their style and my feelings about them, and gradually filter the books that way. Also necessary before we move to the new flat to downsize a bit.

I’ve read few of his books from this collection of 8 – and to be honest I didn’t really understand them at first. The tales are strange not like picture books that I am used to. I read this story, didn’t think much of it at the time, but someone within a few days it popped up in my head about exploitation. Some of the things that stuck with me were the strange details, it wasn’t a linear exploitation story, because the working elephant was enjoying himself and found work rewarding, so it only gradually changed into the strangeness of the situation. And how the elephant group stormed with anger in the illustrations were incredible. It also connected me to thinking about Lee Chiao, that Miyazawa and Lee Chiao both know well lives of farmers and working the land, they seem to have clear-eyed perspectives about land that could be used for exploitation, or people who work the land that were exploited. So the pastoral romance of farm life is completely absent in these kind of settings. It’s almost a shock to me when I internalize their logic and realities.

I bought this book years ago, tried to read it before but wasn’t in the mood for it. I’d been thinking about Shuling, about life and death. Few days ago, I picked it up to read again, and found that this collection of poetic essays, the meditation on the color white, left a strong impression on me. Translation has been beautifully rendered. As the essays build up the layers of the color white, or the feeling of white, ashes, breath of air in the cold…it really captured the moments of life, the textures of life that we feel but find it hard to describe.

This is one of the chapters that moved me. A distillation of life, physical and metaphysical.

白煙

我在某個變冷的早晨，初次從口中呼出白煙，這是我們活著的證據，是我們身體很溫暖的證據。寒冷的空氣湧入漆黑的肺中，經體溫加熱後，呼出白色的氣體。我們的生命奇蹟似的以朦朧卻又奇蹟的現象，在空中散開。